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2012 Oscars Live Blog


I’ll be tweeting/live-blogging/heckling the Oscars as they go on so keep checking back and refreshing the page to see my witty commentary on The Superbowl of Film.

  • Why not just have Morgan Freeman narrate the entire Oscar ceremony?
  • Something uneasy about using Justin Bieber in a Woody Allen parody.
  • Decent opening montage with Crystal, not a fan of the monologue or maybe I just hate song and dance numbers.
  • I’m bored of Billy Crystal already
  • Seat filler for 59 years. Same suit too.
  • If Tree of Life loses, I’m Done.
  • I’m Done. Go Screw yourselves Academy.
  • I predict a sweep of technical awards for Hugo. One for two
  • I love the needless Oscar montage
  • Thanks for recognizing Oscar favorites like Austin Powers and There’s Something About Mary.
  • Costume Design is my kryptonite. I never pick the right winner. ever.
  • The Iron Lady won for makeup? All I thought they did was give Meryl Streep a gap tooth mouthpiece.
  • Well now we have Sean Connery to blame for Jack & Jill
  • Speak chinese all you want Sandra Bullock, that won’t make Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close any better.
  • Want to see A Seperation so badly
  • Marry me Jessica Chastain
  • Good for you Octavia Spencer.
  • Me and The Academy Awards have entirely different opinions of what comedy is.
  • Bradley Cooper is one step away from tying Tina Fey to a pair of train tracks.
  • Was not expecting a Girl with The Dragon Tattoo win for anything. Meh.
  • Cirque du soleil. Exactly why I watch the Academy Awards.
  • Friend just asked me if my Oscars telecast sounded like RD-D2 was taking a shit. Thought it was just me.
  • Wish Robert Downey Jr. hosted the Oscars
  • Chris Rock didn’t do anything for me.
  • Is Emma Stone’s dress made from part of a snuggie?
  • Who would have thought that Emma Stone and Ben Stiller would be the most charming presenters of the night?
  • Emma Stone. Please seek sunlight.
  • Another win for Hugo. Tearing up my Oscar ballot.
  • Good for Christopher Plummer. The most likable part of the movie Beginners.
  • Dammit I did laugh at Billy’s Morgan Freeman and Scorsese impression.
  • President of the Academy speech. Bathroom break.
  • Good to see The Artist win for Best score and hear Penelope Cruz. Win-win.
  • The Oscars are doing a pretty good job making fun of themselves.
  • Sad that 40 some eligible songs were condensed to two. Might as well have just straight up given it to the Muppets.
  • Congrats to The Descendants for winner. Can’t believe the Dean from Community is an Oscar winner.
  • Glad to see Midnight in Paris get Original Screenplay
  • Wish there was more of a segment dedicated to Doug Trumball. Cinematic genius.
  • Short films are impossible to predict.
  • Loving all the shots at Scorsese tonight.
  • Great Speech by Michael Douglas about directing. Spot-on.
  • Happy for the director of The Artist but would have loved to see a win for Malick.
  • Anyone else notice they aren’t doing those separate montages for each Best Picture winner? Wait, why am I complaining?
  • Did this Oscar telecast have a 70’s hair theme going on?
  • I love you Edward Norton but I don’t wanna hear your feelings on film sorry, especially not you Precious.
  • Finally the French win at something.
  • Seriously this Oscar telecast is being dragged out more than the second season of The Walking Dead.
  • Meryl Streep won. Womp, womp, womp. Feels like she wins every year.
  • Yeah, yeah it was an anticlimax but I’m not upset that The Artist won. It deserved it.

That’s the Oscars everyone! See ya next year!


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